Raven Roberts

  • Home
  • About Me
    • Features
    • Contact Me
  • Styling Portfolio
  • STYLING SERVICES
  • Shop
    • Apparel
    • Hats
    • Mugs
    • Phone
    • Pillows
    • Totes
  • Cart
dating

So I’m Dating…

I recently started “dating” again. It’s weird I haven’t really talked to or dated someone in about 3 years. It has been forever, I know. Like I said in my Soulmates post, God has removed and blocked a lot of men from my path over the years. So I haven’t had the chance to “practice” dating in a while. So with that, I’ve realized some things about myself that I don’t tolerate any more and some things I may still need to change.

I stopped writing this to take the love language test. In order Acts of Service (11), Receiving Gifts (10), Quality Time (6), Words of Affirmation (3), Physical Touch (0). I told my friend my results, after I cackled at Physical Touch… 0. It’s not that I don’t like to be touched because I do… I love hugs, kisses and all of that. But like 90% of the questions were about public displays of affection and that I’m not a fan of. Holding hands, hugs and a kiss I’m cool with making out in public… but in the words of my friend Kamilah B “Nah son”. It’s interesting to see how the other categories ranked. They actually make so much sense, I would love my husband to plan my birthday so I don’t have to, Gifts, bring me my favorite food just because, seamless orders are great displays of affection lol. I’ve noticed as it has been for all my dating life… I require a lot of attention so Quality Time makes sense. It’s not that I have to see you all the time but texts and calls are very important.

I’ve learned that I no longer go off words alone but there must be actions behind them. I think this factors into my results as well, less about what you say and more about what you do. I saw a post a while back that said: “Inaction is still an action.” It resonated with me so greatly. There’s always action that comes with someone who wants to be with you, always. The action may come in the form of any of the love languages but there will be some form of action.

Consistency is also very key. I’m always like “Keep up the pace of how things started.” I put up a post on my Instagram a while back talking about how I don’t like change and that’s the same in relationships. I’m very aware life happens so things may change for a little bit but then they should resume business as usual right? ??‍♀️ With that said I’m working to not be upset when things do change and not jump to conclusions so quickly because your girl can be an Olympic jumper at times. I will say my trust levels have completely changed before I would think “Oh is he with some other girl.” Now it’s not the case, it’s more of ” Maybe we don’t have the connection I thought we did.”

I’m also working on not falling too quickly. In the past, I’ve gone from 0 to 100 real quick. This time around I’m taking it one day at a time.  I’ve set my expectations low, expectations not standards. “When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.”― Donald Miller I’m tired f being disappointed when people fall short of expectations they have no idea that I’ve set. With that, I make sure to let my standards be known. Communication is key if I don’t say anything how will anyone know?

Even though I haven’t dated in a while, this has been very eye-opening. Revealing things I’ve worked on, still, need to work on and have stayed the same. I’m proud of my growth and look forward to seeing how God grows me even more. Are you dating? How’s it going? Do you see a difference in how you are now in relationships versus how you were in past relationships?

PC Denton Taylor

Shirt H&M | Shorts Vintage | Shoes TopShop | Bag Lena Erziak | Hat Goorin Bros | Earrings Vintage

communication dating expectations

0
0 Leave a Comment

Reader Interactions

Leave a Comment Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Previous un·mo·ti·vat·ed
Next 1 Dress 2 Ways

Related Posts

Soul Mates

dating

Why I'm Still Single

dating

Celibacy

dating

Primary Sidebar

About Me

Hello, my name is Raven. I’m a New York fashion stylist who loves Jesus, a great bargain, vintage fashion, motivation and this fro.

Newsletter

Search

Archives

Contact Me

  • Email
    style@ravenroberts.com
  • Address
    PO Box 673 New York, NY 10116

Latest Posts

  • Beauty

    Amazon Favorites of 2020: Fashion & Beauty

  • Currently Obsessed With

    2020 Amazon Favorites: Home

  • Fashion

    Few Moda Mystery Box

Categories

  • A Letter To
  • Beauty
  • Black Owned Business
  • Blog
  • business
  • Currently Obsessed With
  • dating
  • Event
  • events
  • Faith
  • Fashion
  • Favorite Things
  • Food
  • Health
  • holiday
  • Lifestyle
  • lookbook
  • Must See
  • natural hair
  • new york fashion week
  • nyfw
  • ootd
  • outfit of the day
  • partnership
  • review
  • Sale
  • Self-Love
  • Skincare
  • Social Injustice
  • sponsored
  • Summer
  • Travels
  • Uncategorized
  • Under 200
  • video

NYFW

NYFW Day 6

Fashion

Never miss a post

Find Me on IG @_ravenroberts
The mirror can be your best friend or worst enemy. The mirror can be your best friend or worst enemy.

I’ve learned to love who I see in the mirror, but I definitely have my days.

To get back on the right train I:
- Play my Bad B**** Anthems

- Recite my affirmations “I am exactly who God made me to be. He doesn’t make mistakes!”

- Do a light beat, lipstick is my jam lately💋

- Put on a cute outfit!

What do you do to get your mind on the right track?
Booties are on my list of must have shoes. In my l Booties are on my list of must have shoes. In my latest YouTube video I list the 5 must have shoes for your wardrobe.

I give so many examples of how you can wear each type. Hint: this outfit makes an appearance 😊

Watch it now and don’t forget to subscribe! (Link in bio)

What’s your go to type of shoe?

Top: stolen from my mom
Skirt: up cycled @goodwillintl 
Boots: @justfabonline
What’s your “SHE DID THAT” this week? Mine i What’s your “SHE DID THAT” this week? Mine is...

I can install a floodlight with these nails! 😝

It wasn’t easy, most things aren’t with long nails lol  but I did it!

Sometimes we let “obstacles” stop us from even starting.

Don’t let a “What if?” Keep you from a “SHE DID THAT!”
My Vice President is a Black Woman!!!!! 🗣🗣🗣

This the outfit I would have worn to the ball 😂

How did y’all feel about all that BGM at the inauguration today?

BTW I’m wearing a Caribbean/ Indian Designer @masabagupta
Declare today: “I love myself!” Each year God Declare today: “I love myself!”

Each year God gives me a word or phrase... This year my phrase is Be You!

This year I’m kicking my socially anxiety in the butt and being authentically and unapologetically me at all times!!

“I will praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Marvelous are Your works, And that my soul knows very well.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭139:14‬ ‭NKJV‬‬

What is your phrase, mantra or word for the year?

PS My other mantra: “I’m where the money resides.” 💵💵💵💵
It’s the slit for me! I’ve been eyeing this s It’s the slit for me!

I’ve been eyeing this skirt (set) from @hanifaofficial for a while now. I waited as it was a bit out of budget.

On Black Friday they had a sale and I snagged it. But I also used  @klarna.

I say all of this to say... keep an eye out for your favorite brands to have holiday sales and you can even break that up into smaller chunks!

Your favorite items aren’t always out of reach... you sometimes just have to do some finagling to get them! 😉

Skirt @hanifaofficial
Sweater @hm
Boots @zara
Bag vintage

What’s you favorite item you got for a great deal?
This year I’m walking away from anything that do This year I’m walking away from anything that doesn’t serve me!

Shop my @liketoknow.it in my bio (shop my looks)
“Girl You Got This!” Sometimes the pep talk c “Girl You Got This!”

Sometimes the pep talk comes from yourself!

Join the List

Copyright © 2021 Raven Roberts
Theme by SheShoppes