Happy Birthday Mommy
Happy Birthday! May this 63rd year of life be the best one yet! On this day I want to thank you for always being there and instilling in me the values I carry with me each day.
You have taught me strength. As a single mother and a woman that has been through her fair share of adversity, you always pushed through, put on a smile and made it happen. No matter what you faced you got up each day and made it happen for us. I still remember you coming home when I was in the 12th grade and telling me you got laid off. I immediately thought “OMG, we are going to be homeless.” Mainly because at the time I kept seeing this commercial where a dad lost his job and the family became homeless as a result of it. Despite my convoluted worries, we never went without, the lights never got cut off and you carried on each day as you had before. You never let me see you miss a beat.
You have taught me sacrifice. Looking back I know know there were many a things you sacrificed so I could have the things I needed and wanted. Whether it was a $300 skateboard for my 13th birthday that I rode maybe 3 times (give or take like 2 times lol). Or whether it was giving me the bigger room because I had more furniture. But the one thing that stands above them all, I remember I was really young and you worked a full-time job and went to nursing school at night. I’m not sure how long this went on but I remember you quit when I said I was sad I never got to see you. You scarificed what you thought was necessary to give us a better life so that we could spend more time together.
You taught me to want true love. Though you were a single mother and you didn’t always have the most amicable relationship with my dad, you wanted me to be married. Since I was young, you have had this desire for me to be in a loving marriage, which has taught me to look for true love and not to settle. You’ve never pressured me to get married, which I appreciate now more than ever. We do have conversations about me getting married and it’s usually me freaking out about not being married yet and you saying “You’ve still got time.” I also will never forget you telling me “I wish you could have love affairs around Europe.” Speaking more to living a carefree life while I still can than one of sexual promiscuity. I often tell my friends this when describing how my mom feels about me not being in a relationship right now.
As I fight through my fourth cry while writing this letter. The bottom line is you have taught me to be the woman I am today. My love for God, the way I carry myself, my values, my love for everything vintage, my mannerisms, my drive, my ambition and my love for fashion and clothing. But I hope one day I will have your posture, your beautiful handwriting, your cooking skills, your enthusiasm, your ability to care so little what others think of you and your ability to be unapologetically you. Basically I pray that one day I am half as fabulous as the woman and mother you are. I love you Mommy. Happy Birthday!
Your One and Only, Raven