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Dear Momma

Happy Birthday!!!

I’m wishing you the happiest birthday from across the country. May this year be a year of unimaginable first’s. May you know on this day and every day how much I love, admire and respect you. So here’s to you, I love you Mom!

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I Thought I was Depressed!

About a year ago I started to feel exhausted, like I would get home and wouldn’t want to do anything, nothing but lay in bed. I had no motivation to do work once I’d been out all day. I would leave the house and 2-3 hours later I’d be so tired and want to go back home. My physical capacity at work changed, I wasn’t able to carry as many garments bags around as I used to. I chalked it at first to getting older. Around the end of summer into the fall I started to think I was depressed. I knew that some of the signs of depression was exhaustion and not being motivated to do anything. It was killing me inside because I’m an entrepreneur and used to working hard, long hours. But I just couldn’t.

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Trusting God in the Waiting

2018 was a lot of trusting God in the waiting. This month marks a year that I’ll have been a full-time entrepreneur in New York. The journey has been stressful, exciting, peaceful, eye-opening, teaching, rewarding and full of waiting. Waiting for checks, jobs and even clothes. God pushed me to trust Him with my finances, which meant stepping out on faith and getting rid of my part-time job. It was scary and relieving all at the same time. Needless to say, I didn’t love my PT job, but it was security… until it wasn’t. I’m not going to lie it’s still hard to wait patiently when there are deadlines looming over my head but there are a few things I’ve learned to do once I’ve realized I need to calm down.

PRAY. Easier said than done when worry overcomes you with no solution in sight. When I’m overwhelmed I pray, I ask friends and family to pray. I pray, sometimes beg well mostly beg God to basically save me. I’ve learned to pray for God’s peace, His timing and for His will to be done. I pray this over and over until peace has overcome me and I’ve stopped worrying and doubting. I contact my prayer warrior for additional prayer. I know that worry and doubt come hand in hand so when I pray I don’t want my doubt or disbelief get in the way. My friends and family cover me so that my peace may come quicker. It’s a lesson that I’m still learning and hope in 2019 that peace and trust come quicker.

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